Those thoughts that Merlin had once
by Overnight's child
Summary: The High Priestess have created a disease. For just a one person. To Merlin. Or course Arthur tries make every thing okey- perhaps he can ;) And then a story starts Morgana/Morgause (sisterpair) Arthur/Merlin (Merthur)
1. He almost died

_Hello, Darkness. My old friend._

Three high priestess were outside. They just stood around the stone table. They looked scary, and very powerful together.

One of them, named Morgana. She picked up one crystal on the stone. Her hands were shaking. The voice of the high priestess' mouth was just high screaming. Another high priestesses just spelled a spell. Nimueh spelled loudly by Morgause's side.

'' _Frencsisca de molsade yrtianmenna osid un san de_!''

In some place far away from them, mountains fell over, the sea pulled back, and all magicians felt some _**terrifying.**_

The Magic wave ran over this land. The land of King Arthur's. All beauty had ran away, all that what Merlin, _Emrys_ , had created suddenly drowned in the ocean.

The disease of _darkness_ lived once again, and infected **_Arthur Pendragon's_** mind and pure gold heart.

* * *

Merlin fell to the ground. He held his breath painfully, and first thought what he had was-

 _I am going to die._

The pain felt like he was burning inside his veins, brains, and bones. He was _just_ dying.

''Merlin. Where on earth did you disappeared?'' The king asked close. Merlin just hoped that Arthur wouldn't hear Merlin's breath. Merlin could die happily if Arthur wouldn't see his manservant die. But, as usually, Emrys was wrong. Arthur had opened the door and saw his friend on the ground, on his knees, and with his painfully breath way. Merlin just looked at his friend and almost choked himself. Arthur didn't know what to do.

He just ran over his friend and took him to his arms.

''Merlin? Please, don't joke with me!'' Arthur said angrily. Merlin just suffocated before he lost himself. He fell to the hell, from Arthur's Arms.

* * *

''Gaius, please. Tell me, what's _going on_?'' Asked Arthur, ''One man from white mountains came today to me. He said that one of these mountains had fell over. Like thousands of pieces. I don't know what to do. Now Merlin just-, and the water- all of it has pulled back from lakes and oceans. Some druids have ran to the forests- that's a shocking miracle. All beauty from nature have died. ''

Gaius got up next to Merlin. The man slept now. He had his breath under control now, at least for a while.

The court physician looked now at his king's eyes. Arthur raised his eyes from Merlin. He faced Gaius' inquiring eyebrow.

''The water had ran away, mountains are broken right now?''

''Yes. _Is this what I think?_ ''

''Magic. Jes, it is. Only the high priestess ** _es_** can do such a things, or a **very** powerful **warlock**. They have done something terrible.''

Arthur looked again at Merlin. King didn't know that Merlin was a warlock. He didn't know that Morgause was still alive, and didn't know the faith about Nimueh. All this pain belonged to the Morgana's shoulders. She have done all of _this_.

''Who have done this? Tell me, please.'' Arthur almost begged. At first Gaius hesitated answer. But Gaius thought that _Arthur was his king. He was asking his help._

''I believe it's Morgana Pendragon, Sire.'' Answered Gaius. Arthur felt like he was deceived. Actually, _he was_! Morgana was his sister. _His sister_. Arthur just cursed his family.

''Where do I will find my sister?''

''Sire-''

''Gaius. Please. I can help Merlin. Your _son_ ,'' Arthur looked at his friend, ''And my friend. So please, tell me.''

''They're in the Island of blessed- I suppose you know where that place is.''

''Thank you, my old friend.'' Said King Arthur before he walked away from Merlin and Gaius.


	2. Merlin's awake

Captures of minds are the most dangerous creatures that humans have ever known. Says a legend of Arthur's

Gaius just watched Arthur as he walked away. The old physician had sent Arthur to the his bane. To his death. Gaius knew that his King wouldn't survive without Merlin, if _magic_ was commanded by Morgana or anyone else high priestess. All Camelot's people were damned.

King Arthur Pendragon rode as fast as he could to the Island of blessed. Arthur was afraid, 'cause he knew, Morgana was the most powerful high priest that world had ever known. The most powerful sorcerer that King had known. Arthur wasn't the only one, who didn't know about Merlin's destiny. Morgana was unaware too. Morgana only knew about her doom. About Emrys. She had ever stopped chasing Emrys. She wanted know him. That was only Morgana's wishes. But after that wish, the high priest wanted the warlock being dead. Morgana believed so hard of her doom. She knew if she don't kill Emrys, she would be dead.

Arthur turned around and heard a voice.

''Who's there?''

From the shadows, to the light, walked carefully a woman. She looked so young, scared and familiar. Arthur had seen this women early.

''Freya?'' Arthur asked carefully. His voice was shaking. Arthur knew she was dead. He had killed her.

''Your highness,'' Freya said to the king and bowed to Arthur, ''You're going to your doom. Please stop.''

''You don't command me.''

''I don't, your highness.''

''Then _who_ does?'' Arthur asked unconsciously a right question.

'' _ **Merlin**_.''

That stopped Arthur. He didn't answer to Freya anymore. He just looked down to this girl.

'' ** _How_**...?''

''You _don't_ know?'' Freya asked, ''Ask him to tell all secrets what he carries alone when you go back to him- but please listen to me, you won't survive **_alone_**.''

Then Arthur took her with him. Freya was dead, she was druid and she was Merlin's friend.

* * *

Merlin woke up wincing. He had have a nightmare. So bad. So, so, so bad. He almost cried.

'' _Arthur_!'' He screamed. He held his tears, before his emotions won.

Gaius walked fast to Merlin and sighted, ''You're awake, I thought a moment you _died_.'' Gaius hugged sweaty Merlin. Merlin just cried in silence.

Then a warlock asked, '' _Where's Arthur?_ ''

* * *

The weather was under controlled by Morgause. She did something what woke Merlin up.

She cursed him. The curse was unlimited. All fears what Merlin had, had became true. All of them. Every single fear. Fears should get Merlin so weak, that he wouldn't live a long time. That was a painful way to die. The curse was use in time before Uther Pendragon almost killed all of high priestess. Some people say, Uther's father had died like this way. And Merlin would be next victim.

* * *

Merlin picked all needed stuff, what he would need. He was going to after Arthur. He wouldn't let Arthur kill himself.

Merlin ran to the stables. He took his horse, outfit it and rode away from Camelot. To his dead.


	3. The dream and lighting strikes

**This is shorter chapter that last one.**

Arthur slept next to the fireplace. He had a very nice dream. About _Merlin_.

 **They both were sitting on the same bench in the edge of training area. They looked at training couple. Arthur felt Merlin wincing when the knights was attacking aggressively towards each other. Merlin did that always, he almost jumped to Arthur's lap. Merlin scared them. He always thought,** ** _what if Arthur would be one of them, that one who would be dead_** **.**

 **''** ** _Mer_** **lin,** ** _C'mon_** **. I will focus. If I don't see how they fight, they'll blame** ** _you_** **for I didn't let them to serve me. So- stop shaking all the time.'' Arthur said and turned his face away from Merlin, who looked at Arthur, shamelessly, a little bit accusingly. Merlin almost hit Arthur to his arm, but Arthur stopped Merlin.**

 **''What's wrong with you?'' Arthur asked while he was taking his friend's hand to his. Arthur's voice was emotionless, cold. Merlin looked fast to knights and sighed. His face turned red. Arthur just waited. Merlin slowly, carefully, judiciously turned his head again to Arthur. The warlock looked at his King. Arthur saw something, what was incredible.**

 ** _Merlin's eyes were gold._**

 **Arthur just looked, hold his friend arm still in his hands.**

 **Soon, the warlock opened his mouth, ''Please,** ** _tell me_** **.** ** _You won't survive alone,_** **tell me where are you right now?''**

 **''I'm with Freya in the woods.''**

 **''Good.'' Merlin said before Arthur waked.**

Arthur looked at this dead druid girl. Freya was sleeping. ' _Can dead people sleep? Oh my god, this is weird.'_ Arthur just laid down again and looked at the sky. The stars were awake with the King of Camelot. And they all waited Emrys.

 _Merlin Emrys._

* * *

Morgana Pendragon saw a light in the sky. It was purer than ever they had seen. It wasn't dark magic. It was pure one. All high priestesses looked at the sky. They were scared. Who was so powerful to stop high priestesses spell. Who can do such a magic?

The lighting strikes were amazing. Red ones and white ones was fighting in the sky. Fighting for a bighter future.

Morgause stepped to Morgana and lifted her hand to Morgana's shoulder. They looked at each other's eyes. Nimueh, behind them two, walked away.

''Where you _think_ you're going? We should be by Morgana's side fighting against Merlin's powers.'' Morgause said loudly. She almost screamed.

Nimueh didn't turn back, look at this high priestess, ''I know. But I was _born_ to serve Emrys. Maybe I could be a high priest, but I am always Merlin's side.''

Then there were only two high priestesses. But they had a clear plan. They'll kill Emrys by _Excalibur_. But they didn't have such sword. They had to took it from Arthur, by force.

 _And they'll kill the king of Camelot._

That was their _terrible_ plan.


	4. The death of Morgana Pendragon

Arthur woke up again. It was morning. The bright one.

The king looked right and he didn't see Freya anymore. There was only a stone, and it had a poem.

 _Maybe there's a light_

 _But there will be your doom._

 _And all what you had loved_

 _had_ _gone too._

Arthur looked it for a _long time._ He didn't actually understand it. Fine, it was very creepy, 'cause it was wrote by the dead woman. That was _only_ creepy thing.

He continued the journey. Without a friend- for a while.

* * *

Merlin rode fast- again. He had to catch Arthur.

* * *

Morgana waited Arthur. She waited him like the cat waits the mouse come out of the cover. It was _sister-brother-hide-_ game.

The high priestess turned around, and looked at this man. This wasn't Arthur.

It was his _servant_.

''Merlin.''

''Oh, High Priestess. You won't call me Merlin. For you, I am Emrys.'' Merlin said bravely.

Merlin was always the bravest man, and the king Arthur didn't even know it- **_yet_**. All Arthur's men knew that, but the king didn't- somehow, he was blind about Merlin and his knightly ways to protect his king, his friend. Arthur didn't want to his feeling win. Every time when he thought Merlin, he listened his **mind** , not his **heart**. Like he shouldn't do. Merlin was advised Arthur- said these words ' _Maybe nothing never collect your worries in your mind, but remember, do what your heart wants you to do, do not listen your mind, it's probably wrong_.'

Morgana cried very loudly, ''You have came to kill me.''

Merlin didn't answer. He just looked at Morgana's eyes. Disappointed.

'' **C'MON!** ''

''It's not my duty to kill you, it's Arthur's.''

''How he can do it, when he's not even here. _Are you fool, or some kind of sick_?'' Morgana walked closer to Merlin.

''Maybe, but not to you.'' Merlin said sharply and looked right over Morgana's left shoulder- Arthur was there. With his _Excalibur_.

The sky, the moon, the sun, the water, all of nature's pieces were running. Running to their own places. All magic was with Merlin now, with Emrys.

Morgause saw all of that. She saw her half-sister to fall to the ground. Arthur saw that too. He killed his own sister. His family.

''What have you done?!'' Screamed Morgause, '' _You fool, what have you done!?_ ''

Before Arthur had some time to speak, Morgause took king's sword and killed herself.

Two High priestesses were dead.

And Merlin was crying.

Arthur knew about Merlin now.

 ** _He was Emrys._**


	5. The true love of Merlin's

Arthur saw Merlin's wet blue eyes. All secrets what Merlin had were revealed. All Merlin walls of his mind, had fallen. All his thoughts came out- all of it.

''Arthur, I can explain! I have always been like this! I was born with it!''

Merlin sat down to the ground and looked at his feet, ''I was only protect you! That's all what I did with it! I didn't use it for the bad things! All what I did, was because of you! You had always been the only one who I really care!''

Arthur just looked at his servant. He didn't know what to do. He didn't want to kill him. Okey, maybe one of thousand pieces of Arthur's mind wanted, because he was hiding this secret for a long time. That was sad. And the sign of fear. Merlin didn't trust Arthur. The king was sad. He almost cried.

''You didn't trust me?''

''What?''

''You didn't trust me, did you?''

''I didn't trust the son of Uther's, but I trusted Arthur Pendragon.''

Arthur went to Merlin, and helped him up. Merlin took Arthur's hand unsure. He wasn't sure. Would he trust him?

Without thinking, Merlin almost pushed Arthur over. Pendragon catch Merlin's shoulders- They was **_so so so_** close each other.

''You Prat- what have you done?''

''Why don't you ask to yourself?'' Merlin said, their noses almost touched, '' 'cause your ego can damage, right?''

''Merlin.''

''Yes, sire.''

''Shut up.''

They both smiled. Before Merlin saw something. The blood bleed from Arthur's eyes, mouth, nose, ears...

Merlin just looked like he was scared. He shouted Arthur's name when he was running away. Arthur was faster and took Merlin to his arms and asked, '' _What's wrong with you?_ I'm okey.''

''Arthur. You're bleeding.''

''No, i'm not.''

''Yes, you are.''

Arthur knocked Merlin out as fast as he could. Merlin wasn't alright. He was more than himself. He was _somebody_ else.

* * *

Arthur went to Gaius' chambers. Arthur had carried all the trip Merlin on his shoulder. Arthur was laughing almost every time, when Merlin spoke while he was unconscious. He actually were still.

Fool Merlin.

''Gaius!'' Called Arthur. He put Merlin to sickbed, and looked around. Gaius came in.

''Sire,'' Gaius said before he saw Merlin, ''What happened?'' Gaius went to Merlin and touched Merlin's forehead. Nothing. Gaius looked Merlin's eyes. Still Nothing. There wasn't sign of sickness. That was magic.

''He, just- had a hallucination. I _don't_ know why...''

''I know.'' Said Gaius.

''What did this to him?''

'' _Magic_.''

''And how to cure this?''

'' _You_ will _find_ a person he truly loves, and make her to kiss him.''

' _'How do I will know_ who she is?!''

''I don't know, just- _think_.''

Arthur looked again at Merlin's face.


	6. Wake UP, YOU idiot :D

_The true love... The true love..._

''Fuck!'' Arthur said. He wasn't sure would _this_ be Merlin's true love. His savior. All what the thought was crazy. _Would this be real? Would this stay? All these emotions?_

He didn't know what to do. Should he trust his own emotions? Should he even _try_?

All moves what Arthur took, went to Merlin. The feet moved without Arthur's permission. The man did not think anymore.

Before all his duties, all rules, every single thoughts what he had, were all gone. The almost ran to save his friend- his _man_ servant- his **_love_**.

Arthur checked was Gaius there. He didn't see anyone. Expect Merlin.

He walked to see his face, they were peacefully. He sat down, on the bench and just looked at his friend. _Why he always thought that Merlin was his friend? He never wasn't._ He has always been Arthur's true love.

Arthur just wondered how wonderful Merlin was, and will always be. His perfect lips, hair, eyes, secrets...

Specially _Secrets_.

But Arthur had his own.

He went closer Merlin's body and toughed Merlin's lips.

Arthur almost felt Merlin's happiness when he kissed him. There was a one problem, Merlin was unconscious.

 _How unconscious person can kiss back?_

Arthur opened his eyes and saw how Merlin was crying. The tears just fell of Merlin's cheeks. Arthur kissed now the tears away. Before Merlin opened his eyes, he hugged Arthur. Arthur scared the action, but he hugged immediately back. They both just were. Merlin's hand were one before around Arthur's waist. Only once. And Arthur blamed himself 'cause Merlin's perfect hands were only once around him. Before Merlin said anything, he kissed his king. Arthur didn't pull back. He was actually rejoiced. Almost coveted it.

Merlin didn't never had the time, when he could said anything like _that_ to Arthur. No, he just can't. Because, he was just a _servantboy_. A _Man_ servant.

The door opened quickly.

Arthur and Merlin, _fast as hell_ , pulled back each other and looked at the door.

Gaius stood there. With some kind of herbs.

''Merlin? You're wake! How?! Actually, _Who?!_ ''

''I don't know,'' Said Merlin, ''I just woke up, and I didn't saw anyone.''

''And I came in like five minutes ago.'' Arthur said. Gaius _actually_ believed it. Arthur came in like- _one minute ago._

''Alright, _guys_.''

Arthur got up on the bench and smiled at Merlin, ''Get better, you look terrible.''

''Of course, _My lord_.'' Said Merlin with a strange smile. Arthur almost smiled too. Then he gave up.

He liked smile, with Merlin. He just waited Merlin to come to him. To his chambers.


End file.
